Always Be Prepared

I've had my hospital bag packed for weeks. I also have a list of the last minute things (like my laptop and makeup) that we (or Ryan) will need to pack before we run out the door. The carseat is sitting at the bottom of the stairs, ready to grab on our way out to the car and I have been making sure my car always has enough gas. I have been ready for weeks now...just in case. I would rather be over-prepared than under-prepared.

Everyone keeps telling me that first babies always go over. Well of course I looked it up and found that only about half of first babies are actually born after 40 weeks (when early inductions are not take into account). As turns out the chances of second babies going over is not much less. The most common gestational age for birth to occur is actually 39 weeks. My mom had all three of her babies early, in fact the one born closest to her 40 week due date was her last baby. I was the first and was 10 days early. Some things that separate me from the typical pregnant mother is that we did IVF and I have gestational diabetes (which I am managing just fine), both of which are risk factors for preterm labor. That is why I keep trying not to make any concrete plans for the month of April.

People might think I'm paranoid, but those who have been following my story from the beginning know the amount of research I've done on IVF and its associated risks. Preterm labor is one of the most common risks. Nobody knows exactly why (maternal age and reason for infertility are both suspected but not confirmed causes), but IVF babies (singletons) are twice as likely as single babies conceived naturally to be born prematurely. For reasons unknown chances of delivering early are even higher when multiple embryos are transferred, even when only one of those embryos sticks around. This is why for the next month (last 4 weeks of my pregnancy) Ryan and I won't be traveling far from home and Ryan will be keeping his phone close. I know I still might go to full term, but it is more likely that our baby will come somewhere between 38 and 39 weeks (maybe sooner, but not likely).

I have been having Braxton Hicks pretty much daily (sometimes only a couple that I notice) for the last couple of weeks, cramping off and on for the last few weeks and I have even been having some contractions. My contractions have never gone on longer than 2 hours and the intensity has stayed about the same even though they have gotten closer together over time-never closer than 8 minutes apart-before they stop, so I've never really panicked (okay maybe a little the first time) or called the doctor about them. I do keep my doctor informed at my appointments and she tells me that all of this is a good sign that my body is getting ready: baby is moving down and cervix is thinning. We'll see just how ready when she checks me for progress at my 36 week appointment!

I'm loving my big perfectly round belly--especially when little baby limbs protrude and distort that perfect roundness. He has been having some very active days, making my belly bounce around sometimes kicking hard enough to move my arm if it's draped across my tummy. My favorite lately has been when he stretches in just the right position for me to feel his little bum pushing out between my now smooth belly button and my rib cage! 

My big round belly...and stretched flat belly button

My tummy is still pretty and smooth (with more peach fuzz than I remember having before). I'm using my Bio-Oil religiously and still crossing my fingers that stretch marks don't make an appearance. I know they are most likely to come in the next four weeks if they're going to and really it's okay. I plan to use the Bio-Oil after birth as well in hopes that it helps my skin bounce back and not look too much like a wrinkled, deflated balloon.

In my weekly pregnant belly pictures I've been paying more attention to whether it looks like I've dropped yet instead of how much bigger my tummy is getting (it's hard to tell). Sometimes I feel like the baby has dropped, but I think it is more just his position and how sprawled out he is. It's weird to think about the shift as things progress: in the beginning I was googling early signs of pregnancy and then looking to see if I was getting a bump from week to week...now I'm googling early signs of labor and waiting to see my giant bump drop from week to week. Soon I'll be watching a baby grow and change from one day to the next! As for all my googling I keep getting the same results as I did in the beginning when it was really just going to come down to knowing I was pregnant when I took a test. Now I guess I'll know what labor is when it happens, but so far I haven't had any sure fire signs that it's coming any time soon.

That's as far as my impatience goes. I want a healthy baby that gets to go home with me so badly that I'm fine with him staying put until his due date. Coincidentally, my due date is one month from today: April 29. I would be thrilled if he came early on his own, but I'm not going to push him. I really hope he's not late though, but not for the reasons one might think. Ryan's sister will be visiting from out of state the week he's due. If he's on time (or early) she'll get to meet him, but if he's even 2 days late she'll miss him and it might be a year before we see her again. I really want her to be able to meet her newest nephew sooner than that!

As ready as I am for this baby to arrive, I'm also not completely ready for him to be on the outside. Inside my belly he's with me all of the time--I never feel like I'm all alone. I always know where he is and I feel every little hiccup and startle. Once he's actually born it might be hard for me to put him down. I'm starting to understand why first time moms have spoiled first babies who always want to be held...there's a possibility I will have a baby like that...and it will be all my fault!